Photo: Alexei Maximenko/Getty Images/iStockphoto I don’t mean to frighten you, but I recently came across a terrible Halloween candy. It was hanging in the Halloween candy aisle of a local Walgreens and it was called Sour Patch Kids Candy Corn. Until the moment I put a piece into my mouth, I was under the impression that it would be regular Sour Patch Kids in the shape of candy corn. It was not.
The truth is that Mr. Goodbar wasn’t included in the original 2018 version of this list, added only now for the 2019 update. I’ll admit that things might have shaken out differently if I’d though to include him then. But you must agree that the fact that I did not even think to include him in last year’s list says something about Mr. Goodbar that we cannot say about Ms. Pay Day. Pay Day was, in fact, included originally. You can’t argue with that.
33. Laffy Taffy “Shake that Laffy Taffy, that Laffy Taffy; shake that Laffy Taffy, that Laffy Taffy.” Did you know D4L put that song out in 2005? We were so young then, and time is moving so fast. 27. Cadbury Screme Eggs I’m not sure if you know these exist. They’re like Cadbury Creme Eggs, except they’re green inside, and they’re not for Easter, when Jesus rose from the dead; they’re for Halloween, when Satan did. Cadbury Creme Eggs are better when you can only make yourself sick on them once a year.
21. Candy Corn Candy Corn is very divisive. I like it, but I can understand why one wouldn’t. Regardless, it’s nice when treats are holiday-specific. It’s fun when you can only indulge in something for a limited amount of time. We have too much of everything all of the time now; I commend Candy Corn for its seasonality.
12. Swedish Fish You know what Swedish Fish are the best? The bigger, single kind that you could get with like five tickets at an arcade. Those were really good. Odd, because the bigger version of the Sour Patch Kid that you could also get with five tickets was less good than a small Sour Patch Kid. Life is funny that way.
Because I am allergic to peanuts, a complex commodities exchange developed between me and my brother after trick-or-treating. Two Butterfingers were worth but one Milky Way. I was at great economic disadvantage and ended up with too many Nerds.
true!
uh, I would be. even when there's only like four Whoppers in the box.
The list to end all lists!🍬🍭
jack May I present you with exhibit A.
They. Are. Incredible.
Moist, even? 😂😂😂
They're luscious compared to red vines
Preach! They are the c***tease of food. Looking like a whole snaccccqqqq but actually ends up being a total disappointment when it comes to delivering in the satisfaction category.
I used to buy bags of the smaller Snickers bars. After a awhile I realized they didn’t taste as good as they used bec they don’t give you as much of the caramel on the smaller bars. I bought a large size Snickers bar and it was so much better! It tastes like a Snickers should.
sixlets, gtfo
I feel the same way about KIM K. DON'T COME AFTER ME
Baby Ruth needs to be much higher on the list imho. Otherwise, no other quibbles. Twizzlers I will concede are an inexplicable addiction.
this is slander
wow canceled
I’m torn on this. They CAN be good but you really have to want one.
I was with you until I saw that Smarties were ranked higher than Junior Mints. Blasphemy
I forgave you putting Mr. Goodbar at 40. But Smarties at 15?!? I guarantee that smarties are left behind in the trick or treat bag well past the last Mr. Goodbar being consumed.
Milky Way 2? You should be ashamed of yourselves
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