Aunt Scores Big With Nephews By Dropping Bombshell Story About Mom Smoking Weed As Teenager

📆 2/17/2020 9:03 PM
📰 TheOnion

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BOSTON—Regaling her sister’s sons with previously untold stories from adolescence, local aunt Sherri Neely scored big Monday with her nephews Bobby and Ben Cecil by dropping the bombshell story about their mother smoking weed as a teenager. “You should have seen their faces when I told them about me and Marci getting high in the Van Halen concert parking lot back in July of ’81. They were hanging on every goddamn word,” said Neely, who delighted in sharing the detailed account of the night the woman, whom the 15-year-old and 17-year-old know as “Mom,” called in sick to her summer grocery store cashier gig, bought three joints from a total stranger on the bus ride to Boston Garden, and smoked them in the parking lot before and after the show. “At first, they said, ‘Yeah, right, Aunt Sherri, Mom is no fun and she hates music,’ but then I told them about how their mom actually became known around school for rolling these perfect little pin joints. I can’t wait to tell them about the time we hitchhiked to New York with the guys who made our fake IDs. They’ll go nuts.” Neely added that if the boys promised to be good, she’d tell them how their parents met on the night their dad sold their mom acid outside the bowling alley where he worked.

Regaling her sister’s sons with previously untold stories from adolescence, local aunt Sherri Neely scored big Monday with her nephews Bobby and Ben Cecil by dropping the bombshell story about their mother smoking weed as a teenager. “You should have seen their faces when I told them about me and Marci getting high in the Van Halen concert parking lot back in July of ’81.

They were hanging on every goddamn word,” said Neely, who delighted in sharing the detailed account of the night the woman, whom the 15-year-old and 17-year-old know as “Mom,” called in sick to her summer grocery store cashier gig, bought three joints from a total stranger on the bus ride to Boston Garden, and smoked them in the parking lot before and after the show.

Write Comment

I can confirm. As an uncle, you gain a certain clout with your nieces & nephews when you relay to them the stories their parents want to forget. This is especially important when they are having a parenting moment. 'I remember when you ate bowls of frosting as your only meal.'

Thankfully she didn't tell then about Marci blowing Roth backstage. They'd probably need therapy.

Aunt Karen trying to be the 'cool aunt'.

yeah, except now you can buy them from a corner store. not so 'countercultural' now, is it?

HillyMichelle 😂😂😂

I read this as “Aunt Scores with Nephews” abs I got really concerned

. Alternate headline: Aunt Undermines Sister's Credibility (no idea who your article is about)

What a coincidence I also smoked weed as a teenager. Although I'm not a mom. Or a grandma. Or a girl.

Nothing is quite as lame as hearing wrinkled old baby boomers talk about their past drug use. Nobody wants to hear it.

Hahahahahahaha!

GZO23 Ctb22684 APA?

Yeah, it’s fun being the cool aunt!

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