Ask Amy: Ending a 50-year lie

For the past 50 years, I have lied that I was in the military and served in Vietnam.I ran away from a bad home life at 13 and lived on the streets. It was horrible. I was beaten up and sexually attacked. I tried to commit suicide twice.I met a woman and we had a son.I was drafted for the army during the Vietnam War, but didn’t pass the physical.So, later on when guys got together and started telling war stories, I joined in with mine. Lies. I kept telling more lies to cover the first one.

Telling the truth now will be hard to do, but it will liberate you from the burden you’ve been carrying. The truth will also liberate your son from unknowingly perpetuating this lie later on. The way to have a hard conversation is to preface it by stating: “This is very hard for me to say. I’m worried about your reaction. I hope you will understand, and I hope you will find a way to forgive me for what I’m about to tell you.”

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