Area Man Loads Up On Half-Priced Armistice Day Candy

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CHARLESTON, SC—Saying it would be silly not to take advantage of such great deals, 31-year-old computer programmer Jared Hermann confirmed Thursday he had stopped by a local Walgreens to load up on clearance sale of Armistice Day candy. “It’s my little annual tradition to hit up the stores once Nov. 12 rolls around, because that’s when they’ve got all the good stuff priced to move,” Hermann said as he showed off his haul of Armistice Day favorites such as Mary Jane taffy, sassafras drops, and clove-flavored chewing gum, treats that were selling for three times as much just a week ago, as people prepared to celebrate the 1918 cessation of hostilities on the Western Front. “Sometimes, I can’t believe how much you can get for just a few bucks, but I picked up a bunch of the Reese’s Armistice Day chocolate memorial wreaths, as well as a couple bags of Liberty chews, which is of course what we Americans called Germany’s Haribo gummy bears during World War I. I’ll probably sneak a few when I get home, but I’m going to save most of these for next year.” Hermann told reporters he also planned to check out the sales at local costume stores, explaining that he hopes to dress up as an assassinated Archduke Ferdinand for Armistice Day next year.

 

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it's spelled armistace*

Great time to snag that General Pershing Pez Dispenser.

Hey, don't knock Poppy Tarts until you've tried them.

All was not silent on the southern front later that night.

Shit, they only sell Bazooka Joe gum at this candy store?

Ah sweet surrender.

chrenen don't miss this candy either

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