Someone who is a born nurturer, who always seems to have the strength and wherewithal to help others. Someone can be experiencing anxiety as they sit right next to you, even as they help you work through you own shit.
Someone can have anxiety who seems depressed, not anxious. Who seems confident, not crest-fallen. Who seems fearless, not fearful. There is no rhyme or reason with anxiety, and whatever notion you may have about an anxious person is probably wrong, or at least cannot possibly apply to everyone who experiences anxiety.
What I’ve learned over the past few years is that no one will know I’m experiencing anxiety unless I tell them. And—here’s the thing that has been the most earth-shattering revelation—it’s okay for me to share my anxiety with others. Doing so is not admitting a weakness; it’s a sign of strength to tell the truth., I’ve been making a point whenever I can of telling my husband when I’m in the middle of a panic attack, sometimes even my children. And it’s helped immensely.
Looking back at my experience of panic and anxiety, I’m realizing that I spent far too many years holding my anxiety inside because I didn’t quite believe it was real. I had one specific idea of what being anxious meant—the stereotypical outward signs of anxiety like fast talking and jitteriness—and because my anxiety wasn’t quite like that, I didn’t exactly believe it was real.
I think that if I had known what was going on—and most of all, that my experience was valid and something worth sharing—I would have been able to navigate the stormy waters of living with anxiety with at least a little more ease.
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