I haven’t worn a push-up bra since high school. But here I am, a decade later, wearing one at my desk. I have been tasked with test-driving all kinds of bras, from the comfortably wireless, to the daintily lace-trimmed, to that magical, boob-picker-upper: the push-up. The contraption, padded like a stiff memory foam pillow, has the gravity-defying ability to lift and squeeze my breasts together as if I were going to eat breakfast off of them.
Wearing the push-up bra became sort of a running joke in the office. My boobs were annoyingly perkified, severely enthusiastic, and forever looking upwards as if God would come down and bless them himself. And be gone that gaping canyon in between them! I now had cleavage like I was cosplaying a buxom Western saloon floozy or a dirndl-wearing German beer hall babe.
High school boobs. Just saying that phrase brings back growing pains. And it will forever be associated with the push-up bra — so much so that just wearing this porntastic, top-drawer piece gives me a tinge of PTSD. High school boobs were aspirational breasts. Popular tits. Cool girl knockers. They were everything I was not. Instead, I was perpetually flat-chested, which was something I was bullied mercilessly for in middle school and high school.
When I got home after my push-up bra experiment, I chucked it. I thought about burning it like a ’60s-era feminist, not because I believed so strongly in rebelling against the patriarchy yadayada, but because I hated the cartoonish ice-cream scoop aesthetic of it.
I was about to swear off bra-wearing for good when the market editor passed off two bras to me to test out: one with wire and another sans wire. Too scarred from the wire of the push-up bra, which I did indeed try, I gravitated towards the wireless incarnation. The bra was a butter-soft piece of fabric that wasn’t meant to violently lift my breasts, but to rather cradle them like a newborn baby. A bralette. I wore the bra all day, and in fact, I actually forgot I was wearing it.
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