12 Dads on How the Pandemic Forever Changed Them as Parents

stay-at-home orders initiated perhaps one of the greatest social experiments of all time when it comes to parenting. Schools switched to remote online learning. Daycares closed. Some working parents found themselves crammed side-by-side, conducting Zoom meetings in closets while their kids started kindergarten on a computer. Health care professionals, grocery store employees, and otherFor some people, relationship roles shifted dramatically too, as parents navigated new domestic dynamics.

I discovered that learning via Zoom is not for the faint-of-heart parent and not the ideal instructional method for a good percentage of kiddos, especially those who aren’t neurotypical. I learned that children are way more resilient and tenacious than they often get credit for, being able to acclimate to their entire world being turned on end and finding a way to thrive regardless. Teachers are angels in disguise and don’t get paid near enough for what they do.

Our daughter was born early in the pandemic, so stay-at-home orders meant I got to spend a lot of time with her in her first few months of life. I was grateful for the extra bonding time, but at first, whenever she cried, I would get stressed out and immediately tried to figure out what the problem was. The problem was me. Babies cry and that’s normal. I just needed time to better understand her cues and whether she actually needed something. That was a game changer, especially for my wife.

Your children are not your children. It’s true. You’d think that during all that up-close time of being stuck at home, you’d wield more influence somehow as a father, but, lo, they really do their own thing. They go their own way. They have their own ideas and trajectories. They are in your house but not of your house. —“It’s important to make space for feelings.”

. But they adapted and grew past those things in a way that really makes me hopeful about the people they’ll become when they grow up. —“It became clear that my children are my purpose.”

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