The game is all about keeping your peace of mind, and everyone who had been in the castle from the start was so immersed by this point. It’s so dislocated from reality; it means emotions run much higher, with people getting more aggressive, defensive, and insecure than they would in everyday life.
But, like, I’ve seen actual death as a doctor. I couldn’t connect emotionally in the same way because I knew it wasn’t real. That this person was just going to be sent back to their normal life.I wasn’t gutted or anything. I logically knew it was going to happen – I’m a smart guy and was a threat to the traitors, so why wouldn’t they kill me at some point?They were never going to be able to recruit me – I would have walked – so I was of no use to them. I would have killed me, too.
In the end, I was actually pretty happy about being killed. It was getting hard to stay emotionally neutral; I felt so guilty when it came to voting people out.It may sound odd, but that’s Getting back home to London was surreal. I went back to work pretty soon after and the period between filming and airing was long and it made it all feel like a fever dream.Kieran, Wilf and I would go to the pub together and have a catch up and a laugh about how weird everything would be later in the year
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