The awkward person’s guide to surviving the work Christmas do

and the inevitably inappropriately banging music of the venue .

You don’t know who you’ll end up floating next to as you skirt the groups of people who appear to be conversing naturally. You think of yourself as a strong, independent woman unswayed by the opinions of others on your outfit choices, but you wobbled, you broke, and now you’ve got bright red, weepy armpits because the makers of clothing stick sequins places they shouldn’t go.

I’m not completely devoid of chat. It’s just that my preference is to avoid mindless conversation. I don’t see the point. I prefer meaningful dialogue. I’m not an intellectual. Just someone who prefers nice people to nasty. I don’t like teasing, making fun or humiliating them.

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