with Kristin Gallant ― describes a scene familiar to anyone who has ever tried to convince a small child to leave a playground, birthday party, or any other fun scene at which they’d rather stay.
At the same time, Klein explained, toddlers “have no sense of time, so they do not move through the world with a sense of what comes next.” Our adult focus on needing to pick up a sibling, or get home to start dinner, can “clash with the toddler living in the here and now,” Klein said. “Whatever they are doing right this minute is their focus.”
“No child wants to be left behind or abandoned, particularly at these ages. It says to them that they are bad and will be left,” she said.sends the message that if they’re not obedient, you might abandon them — and over time, that approach can have unwanted consequences,” Margolin and Gallant said. Margolin and Gallant suggest that you handle this kind of a situation by acknowledging your child’s feelings: “I know you want to keep playing and this is hard,” and then holding steady the boundary you have drawn: “It’s time to go now.”To help kids feel like they have some agency in the situation, they suggest that you offer a choice such as, “Do you want to walk or be carried? You choose.”
Even if your child is upset, try to maintain your calm to help them regulate. Klein explained that you can handle the departure “in a loving and clear way.” You might say something like, “It’s hard to stop playing, I’ll walk you out to the car,” Klein offered.
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