Money Moral Maze: How to fairly distribute a gift between two children?

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A reader wants to gift £40,000 to their two children, but is unsure how to fairly distribute the money due to past financial support given to one of the children. Quantifying past support and trying to quantify it could lead to family conflicts.

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Some may believe the answer to this question is simple. But while it seems fair at first to subtract the £3,000 you paid towards your younger daughter’s course from her allowance, this may actually end up opening a can of worms.Firstly, exactly quantifying what you have given to each child in the past may be difficult.

Gifting to children also isn’t a commercial transaction. What you give to your children doesn’t need to fit on a balance sheet and all add up – it can be according to need at the time. This £3,000 that you gifted years ago was because your daughter needed it to do what she wanted to do, and I’m sure you’d have done the same for your other daughter, were she to have needed it.

It is no doubt a lovely gesture that you made for your youngest when she needed help with the cost of her education but unless you gave the same amount to your eldest, it could prove tricky when looking to gift them both more money. It’s not hard to imagine she may well feel a little hard done by, even if she is receiving a generous sum now.

 

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