As football manager Brendan Rodgers is criticised for calling a BBC journalist 'good girl', Claire Cohen reflects on how she came to hate the termHave you ever been called a “good girl”? I don’t mean as a small child, when you ate your greens or got full marks in a spelling test, but later, as an adult.
, that it was what I should be aiming for. That being “good” would bring with it certain rewards and recognition.this week. Lewis had been pressing Rodgers for his insight into the Scottish premiership title race, when he refused to answer and ended their tense post-match interview by saying “done, good girl, well done”.
I spent years doing this in my friendships: presenting a version of myself that my friends might see as good or desirable. I made myself smaller, so others could feel bigger, setting in motion a pattern that meant I constantly felt paranoid or on the back foot. That I never actually felt good enough and was always chasing another adrenaline hit from going above and beyond for my friends. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
In truth, it took being faced with a professional upheaval that I could either choose to accept, like a good girl, or challenge. I chose the latter., Maja Molfino describes five “good girl myths”. There’s the myth of rules – following authority, instead of trusting your instincts. The myth of perfection – setting yourself impossibly high standards. The myth of logic – not using your intuition and thinking instead that A will lead to B.