I longed to meet my birth parents but they only ended up disappointing me

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'At one point she pulled the covers down. When I questioned this she told me she was trying to ‘keep it in the family’'

I started to get phone calls at work from an unknown number. I asked who it was, only to hear ‘don’t you know by now?’. The voice kept me guessing and by the time I worked it out, I was annoyed.When I did see her, she was physical, putting her arms around me all the time. If I stayed the night, she would come into my room last thing at night and first thing in the morning.

It was after this incident that I clicked that she wasn’t quite all there. I was not dealing with someone who was simply pleased to see me. I wouldn’t want to speculate when I have no expertise in the field, but I imagine she had an undiagnosed mental health condition. I tried to encourage her to get help, but she told me the only person who could sort it out was me.As I attempted to distance myself from her, the family tried to keep hold of me. Mary’s husband turned up and said that I had to accept her ‘warts and all’ and if I wasn’t almost family he would beat me up for giving up on her.

It’s hard to say whether I would go through the process again, knowing what I do now. I think probably not.

 

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