than a year, we talk every night when we all game together on xbox and I feel like I have become close with these girls.
From what you have said here, it sounds as if your husband told you only because he thought you were going to find out and he should get his version of events in your head first. I see that he also chose to drop this bombshell on you on your birthday. Clearly covering his back was more important than doing anything that might spoil your birthday forever...
He chose to behave like in this your home. Does he know now that you hate what should be have been your sanctuary against a sometimes very tough world? How does he think that that could be changed - redecorating, moving furniture around or even replacing anything that played any part in his encounters with this woman? Or even moving house altogether? This is his mess to mend and he should be the one putting in the effort.
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