My husband and I could never agree on bed pillows — but now they remind me of him

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“A pillow is a pillow is a pillow,” Phil would say. “Unless you intend to smother me, two should be enough.” My argument was that you didn’t just “make” a bed, you “dressed” it. This was a puzzlement to Phil. I went into greater detail. There are sleeping pillows, sham pillows, décor pillows and likely an accent pillow or two. He sat gamely at the bottom of the bed while I pointed out each pillow subspecies.

When the pandemic arrived, Phil and I spent afternoons curled up on the bed, using each and every pillow for support, to munch popcorn and watch a vintage cowboy movie. Certain pillows were better than others for propping up on the bed. Whoever landed on the bed first got their choice. Cardiac arrest took him suddenly, not prostate cancer. I left him for the last time at the hospital taking one final opportunity to run my hands over his beautiful hair and to snuggle as close as I could with all the machines there.

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