This is how we do it: ‘We’ll put on our sex playlist and change the lights to purple. It ignites a fire inside us’Ellen and I met through work many years ago and gradually became friends. Both our marriages fell apart during the pandemic and about a year later the friendship got stronger, and so did our desires. Both of us had been in a marriage where sex just wasn’t there. It was difficult to talk about it with my ex: it was almost taboo.
Ellen and I live separately but there are probably only one or two nights a week that we don’t have sex. Often we’ll have to be discreet because of the children – I have two kids from my marriage and she has three from hers. Ellen’s bed is quite noisy, and there was a time when her kids asked us what that banging was. There are moments in the morning when we think it’s safe and then we’ll hear running down the corridor and have to quickly stop what we’re doing.
On those nights I feel like I’m addicted to seeing Ellen climax. I sort of crave that: it’s intoxicating.I think sex makes me a happier person, especially to feel so desired and to desire someone so much I had my first orgasm at 30, after I got a vibrator. But I hid it from my partner at the time – I felt worried as we had never talked openly about sex. I don’t think I fully understood what it felt like to have an orgasm – I faked them with my ex. But once I’d had one, it was amazing. I couldn’t believe what I’d been missing.
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