Stephen Colbert on Trump’s hush-money case: ‘The trial of what feels like a century’

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Late-night hosts discuss the second day in Donald Trump’s criminal trial, from naps to jury selection to the actual allegations of covering up hush money

Stephen Colbert on Trump’s hush money trial: ‘We are reminded that though the wheels of justice may turn slowly, eventually a panel of impartial citizen jurors will do the indispensable public service of listening to testimony about Donald Trump’s mushroom dong.

“But after he hears details on Trump’s sex life, I’m guessing he’ll be listening to a toaster in the bath tub,” Colbert joked. On the first day of the trial, Trump appeared to fall asleep during the trial – “he took a little white power nap,” Colbert quipped – but on Tuesday, “he was sharp, focused and…he fell asleep again,” Colbert said.

“He claims he didn’t have sex with Stormy Daniels, he just paid her $130 grand out of the goodness of his heart,” Kimmel scoffed. “And the truth is, paying a woman to keep her quiet about having sex with you while your wife is at home with your newborn baby isn’t illegal. What’s illegal is falsifying records to make it a business expense, which he made so his supporters wouldn’t find out he’s a lying, cheating scumbag.

 

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