Hey LinkedIn, I’m beyond thrilled to offer you an exciting opportunity

Hey LinkedIn, I have an exciting new opportunity just for you. You’ve become the last digital platform standing as your rivals have succumbed to what the author Cory Doctorow has rightly dubbed “”, the process by which once-useful platforms are destroyed by their own business models.

In contrast, LinkedIn, you are a more pedestrian, polite and professional expression of our digital selves, a place where we put on the work tie, the tailored jacket and the sensible shoes. People on LinkedIn have a real identity, an education, a backstory; they are not nameless trolls who can vent and attack others with the impunity of anonymity.

Too much of what passes for engagement is twee, cloying humblebragging, where every average PowerPoint becomes “amazing thought leadership”, where every meeting is a staged photo-opp and where any point of friction is politely glossed over.What is “beyond thrilled”, anyway? Winning a tight match might be thrilling, skydiving too, even being exposed to a big, bold new idea.

Then there are the regular creepy disclosures that people have been looking at one’s profile, but you will only let us know who if we sign up to premium. Because, despite your unctuousness, you are home to a terrific network of people conditioned to be respectful, who trust the space by sharing their economic selves and professional identities.Loading

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