Fragile ego? Or, we just don’t care? Why sorry can be the hardest word.

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I had a tussle on the nature strip with my sister-in-law, where I tried to put her into a figure-four leglock and make her take back what she said. My apology afterwards was cheap, writes Kate Halfpenny | OPINION

There’s humility and grace. Imagine if Scott Morrison came back from Hawaii and said, “I’m sorry I left my post when my country was burning. It was inexcusable,” instead of “my family deserved a holiday”.Or that in his mea culpa George Calombaris hadn’t said underpaying staff by nearly $8 million was an “oversight”.

In Louise Penny’s series of Inspector Gamache novels the lawman protagonist claims four sentences lead to wisdom if you learn to say them with meaning.That’s it. Nothing tricky. Basically, you just have to be honest with yourself and others. Yes, I’m quoting a fictional detective, but the man solves so many crimes based on his insights into human behaviour that I’m prepared to trust him.

As I get older I can’t be bothered with the slightest deceit, vanilla though that sounds. Much easier to own your achievements and your stuff-ups and move on towards a better night’s sleep.A couple of days ago I was curt to my penpal friend Christine. I fought the temptation to add “I was tired and thought the rat was eating the Skoda again” to my apology. Christine was ace: “That was kind.” I felt half in love with her and fully in love with the power of sorry.

Things I wish I’d said sorry for: crashing the car at 17. Kissing my friend’s bloke. Gossiping about a colleague because I was jealous. Making my husband get an Aldi special buys briefcase safe.

 

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Apologise to the neighbours.. they are the ones who arent talking to you

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