Barnaby’s booze ban? I’m thirsty for the details

There comes a point in the life of every 57-year-old accountant-turned-political firebrand-turned-deputy-prime minister-turned-bonk-ban-recipient when he finds himself contemplating a video he didn’t know was taken, starring himself at an hour he can’t recall, sprawled out in a suit next to a planter box outside a Canberra kebab shop, cursing a blue streak and otherwise talking 86 kinds of Ewokese to someone who wasn’t actually on the end of his upside-down phone..

For those of us who thrive on a good riches-to-rags-to-riches-to-Canberra on a Wednesday night-to-riches story, it was practically poetry. And then, as ever, bloody Barnaby had to ruin the script by opening his mouth.

It’s not as though Barnaby is the first public figure – or even the first politician – to turn teetotal in office. Yesterday, NSW Premier Chris Minns revealed he’d been off the booze for two years, citing a stonking hangover following a friend’s birthday celebrations, coupled with the need to remain clear-headed in office, as the motivation for abstaining. Somehow, all of that seemed entirely in keeping with his clean-cut persona.

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