At 26, mum still takes me food shopping. At which age will I grow up?

The age at which we are truly adults, according to a recent survey of 2000 people, is 26. Speaking in my official capacity as a 26-year-old, I consider that figure misleading. As the Irish mathematician Des MacHale once noted, "the average human has one breast and one testicle". I reckon the "adulthood at 26" statistic is another victim of this statistical pitfall.

Then there's the second group, the runts of the 26-year-old litter, also known as my people. Those of us in this second group were lured to glittering metropoles, wrongly believing their streets to be paved with acceptable living conditions. We can't buy houses because they're so expensive. We can't have dogs because we rent, and our landlords won't allow it.

At 26, however, you'll be some way behind. The survey results, which were published by England's National Citizen Service, were followed by a list of the Top 50 Signs of Independence: their secret hope being, I suppose, given that they are a programme that teaches teenagers life skills, was that this list would expose us 26-year-olds as the incapable, burdensome adolescents we are. Believe me, I'm reluctant to contribute to that narrative, but I was some way off scoring a full house.

I think I'm representative of city-dwellers my age, and our scores will, I'm sure, be less than the scores our parents would have recorded.I don't have a will because I don't imagine my friends and loved ones will be inclined to fight over my most valuable physical possession, which is my one-quarter share in my flat's TV.

At 26 I’d been around the world been Married and divorced started my own business I’d say there’s not much hope for you stay with your mum as long as you can

This is your average Greens/Labor voter.

When your wife does your mum's job

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Feminized men, the kind of boys raised in single mummy families or with weak fathers. The kind of soft, weak, well behaved men that women find most abhorrent.

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