Rumors of stolen children adopted by unsuspecting parents circulated in international adoption circles for decades. And now a recent report confirms they're true. Nearly 30 years ago, Marjie Alonso adopted two boys from Paraguay. I need to take a hard look at the families I dismantled to build my own.
stated that untold numbers of South Korean children had been stolen from their families, trafficked into international adoption through widespread fraud.In 1995, after years of miscarriages, including the loss of twins, the advice from my doctors, therapists and everyone I talked to was to adopt, and I welcomed the idea. I was in my mid-thirties — “old” by adoption standards — and I knew I wanted any child I raised to have a sibling. I decided to adopt two children at once.
According to his birth mother, who was not forthcoming with the details of his origins, my younger son had been relinquished when his father, who she hinted was an office worker where she cleaned, would have nothing to do with her after she became pregnant. She carried and gave birth to my son while living on her own in the city, poverty and distance keeping her secret for her. She didn’t see her family during that time. She told only one sister after the fact.
The truth, made horribly plain in the stories recently released, is something very different. In international adoptions, children are often coerced away from mothers, or literally stolen. My kids weren’t stolen, but there have been confirmed cases of babies stolen in Paraguay and everywhere else there is international adoption.
Had I been asked, I would not have given that same $30,000 to save my sons’ biological families and come home empty-handed, a difficult truth to reckon with.There’s no way to know what the boys’ lives would have been like if they’d been able to stay with their biological mothers, and I don’t presume to speak for the mothers and say they’d have chosen that path.
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