' I’m bored. I’m depressed. And I’m fantasizing about partying with martians.'
At its height, Bill Clinton and his niece partied at Mars 2112. So did Brad Pitt and Maddox. It was a God-tier location for a birthday party. It was a place to go on awkward first dates in hopes that ordering the Magellan mozz sticks might break the ice. And it was a great place for mothers to take their mortified teenage daughters in 1999.
My mother, born and raised in suburban Baltimore, made it to New York City just once in her life. She planned the weekend trip, dragging me and my sister around the city with that forceful Mom Energy, ignoring our teenage scowls. She insisted upon the “NYC tourist experience” as we huffed it through Central Park and toured the Statue of Liberty. We saw’s plaza, where my mother tried to catch Al Roker’s attention with a neon sign.
By the mid-2000s, Mars 2112 had already declared bankruptcy a handful of times. Fraud allegations haunted the troubled owners., never even making it to auction, instead repossessed for liens. Patrons were now greeted by bored aliens in frayed wigs. The space simulator ride was busted and just a movie now, “if anyone wanted to watch it before entering the dining room,” according to an online review. Cosmic drink specials continued to keep the place afloat among the Midtown happy hour crowd.
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