Avoiding your emotional truth only gives it more power over you and your partner. Here's what to do instead, writes jwebbphd
Research shows that emotional integrity is not a constant personality trait, but something that must be worked on.Integrity is defined as the quality of being honest and fair; the state of being complete or whole; incorruptibility; soundness. What, then, is emotional integrity? It's all of those things, specifically applied to your own inner emotional life. It’s knowing what you feel and why, and being able and willing to face it and share it, even if it’s painful.
Surprisingly, many people of high personal integrity actually struggle with the emotional kind. It’s possible to be a bastion of honesty in general, yet not be fully able to face and own your own feelings. A 2021 study by Landa and English, et al., found that people’sabout their own emotions — how well their appearance and actions reflect what they are truly feeling inside — varies as they go about their everyday lives.
She learned the lessons of childhood emotional neglect all too well. Today, she is unaware of her deepof repeating her parents' mistakes, taking on financial burdens that could take her away from her own kids. Her intentions are good and she is a caring, loving mother. But, in this instance, she is not showing emotional integrity.
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