Toxic positivity: When hearing ‘stay positive’ makes you feel worse. Learn why it is harmful and impairs healing

When my teenage daughter was badly injured in 2021, which drastically affected her mobility, people rallied around us in person and on social media with statements such as “stay positive” or “everything will be fine”.

In times of adversity, searching for something positive to focus on or taking the #goodvibesonly approach can be a coping mechanism. “Being a happy person is not toxic positivity. Denial of everything other than positivity, however, is toxic,” she said.Ms Caroline Ho, a professional counsellor with online counselling and coaching platform Talk Your Heart Out, said that toxic positivity is the belief that people should maintain a positive mindset in the midst of challenges and tough situations while ignoring all negative emotions.

“We look up to them because they seem to be able to get their life together while we struggle. We then view positivity as a ticket to greater acceptance and happiness.” “Social concepts of masculinity, such as a desire to appear strong and detached from emotions, can fuel alienation and a reluctance to seek help.

In another study, published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin in 2016, parents who suppressed negative emotions and amplified positive feelings in front of their children felt less emotionally well.Being able to share negative emotions can be part of the healing process. It is essential to be able to grieve before there is acceptance and recovery.

When strong emotions overwhelm you, take a moment to try these grounding techniques, or exercises that help you reconnect with the present moment:Engage in guided imagery while taking deep breaths to recalibrateHOW TO DEAL WITH TOXIC POSITIVITYMs Chai advice is to let the person talk about their feelings openly and avoid constructing a positive response to everything they share.

In our land, think the government politicians are the ones who are the biggest culprit of this, no?

Someone should relay the message to those positive vibes only social influencers.

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