After infertility and conceiving through IVF, this mum of 3 wrote a children’s book to remove its stigma

Caryn Lim wrote her children’s book The Blessing after conceiving her three sons through IVF, to show her kids how they came about. When Caryn Lim and her husband, Dr Tan Yung Khan, a urologist, first got married in 2015, starting a family was not on their minds. They were in their twenties and forties respectively and were enjoying their careers and travels.

Lim hadn’t realised that her endometriosis affected her egg quality so much that, even though her doctor retrieved 17 eggs, it resulted only in three embryos.. “I was sleeping, eating and resting well. But it was not successful and the disappointment was hard to bear. We took a long holiday away before coming back to try again.”Lim said she was fortunate with the second transfer using the remaining two embryos, and conceived in 2019.

The IVF process changed that. “It forces you to surrender and understand that there are many things in life beyond your control. While IVF can bring up your chances at conception, it is not a 100 per cent guarantee that you will get pregnant. In fact, far from it.”Her perseverance and tenacity paid off: In February 2020, Lim gave birth to her first son, Euan. “I was elated and relieved,” she said.

These preconceived notions caused a “hush-hush” mindset and one could go through the process without being able to talk to anyone openly, she added. She even had well-meaning friends who encouraged her to take more time to conceive naturally instead of getting fertility assistance.“Looking back, if I had known that IVF was more common than I had thought, I’d have probably felt less alone. I just needed pure support.

“In this book, I have shared key moments in my fertility journey – moments that are etched in my heart.

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