Rappler's Life and Style section runs an advice column by couple Jeremy Baer and clinical psychologist Dr Margarita Holmes.
It is quite reasonable of you to lose interest in a spouse who at best is dividing his interest between you and other women, and may even have lost all desire for you. What you do about it though will depend on your personal circumstances, but common options include 1) trying to put things right with your spouse, if necessary using a counselor, 2) remaining together but leading separate lives, and 3) separating completely.
Thus, in my view, to fantasize about other men when you have sex with your husband is terrific and validating if you get off on this and truly enjoy the idea of someone other than Carlos making love to you. Otherwise, I would strongly suggest you focus your energy on something else.
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