[DETOURS] Crossing bridges and seas with my father

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'My father devoted his life to accompanying me to school every day, leaving not only his potential career behind but also throwing gender roles out the window.' Detours

Editor’s note: We grew up believing that fathers are meant to be breadwinners while mothers should stay at home to take care of their children. In this Father’s Day essay, Micah Edem shares how her father decided to take a detour and swap roles with her mother, and for that she will forever be thankful.

I was only a kid who knew nothing about the world. But my father thought otherwise. He saw and knew what I was capable of, even as young as I was at the time. My father was the first person to believe in me and because of that, I felt like I could conquer the world and cross bridges and seas. Every morning, when I arrive at the seaport located one town away from my home, I am able to witness the first streak of sunlight breaking through the early morning sky. During the boat ride, I would eat the breakfast that my mother packed for me. Oftentimes, when the big waves hit the boat and splashed inside, my food would taste a little salty. This made me look forward to breakfasts even more. I felt like I was having a picnic in the middle of the ocean.

Perhaps, this was what my father saw in me when he decided to break free from the gender roles that have been deeply ingrained in our patriarchal society. Most especially in the Philippines where the stereotype is that mothers take care of the children while fathers go to work. My father took a different route – a detour. My father devoted his life to accompanying me to school everyday, leaving not only his potential career behind but also throwing gender roles out the window.

He would always remind me that just like the skies reflecting God’s beautiful creation, the talents that we have should be used to glorify the Source of it. I live by that reminder up to this day. Indeed, I am a combination of my father who gave up his dream to accompany me to school every day so that I can start mine and my mother who sacrificed and worked hard for me to fulfill that dream.

 

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