‘I can’t stop obsessing about my boyfriend’s beautiful, glamorous ex’

‘I’ve reconnected with an old friend and can’t help but feel a spark of attraction I haven’t felt towards men before’

Retroactive jealousy occurs when we become jealous or upset thinking about someone’s previous relationships or sex partners. As you are experiencing, it can often result in obsessive thoughts; comparisons between yourself and the other person; feeling anxious, upset or angry or worried when thinking about your partner’s exes; and excessively worrying that your partner may be thinking about their exes or that they might leave you for their ex.

Firstly, stop looking at this woman’s social media, immediately. This one requires willpower and discipline.

But while I don’t want you to dwell in your obsession with this woman, I do want you to explore the contours of your own jealousy for a moment. Jealousy, as you are experiencing, can have damaging impacts on our relationships and mental health when we act on it in ways that are distancing, controlling, possessive, or when we use it to put ourselves or other people down. But when we sit with jealousy and reflect on it, it can be harnessed in more beneficial ways.

Oh get a grip printing crap when there’s more important things happening in the world!

That’s not good

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