Like so many, I stepped into parenthood blissfully unaware of how the presence of children would dramatically alter my life. Before having kids, I assumed that as a mom, if I wanted to go somewhere, my kid would come with me. If I wanted to do something, my kid would either do it with me or occupy themselves by doing some other independent activity. I had no idea that parenting small children is frequently a battle of wills.
Suddenly, my days orbit around meal times and nap times and diaper changes and tantrums and play . It’s difficult to meet up with friends who’s child-free lives feel galaxies away. And so I must pay tribute to my friends without kids. Thank you. You have shown me such patience, such warmth, such acceptance. You show me the qualities that I hope I can show my own kids, the qualities that I strive to model as a parent. Your friendship both keeps me grounded and uplifts me. We may have vastly different daily routines, but we will always be able to reconnect over the newest reality TV drama. And our own lived dramas, no matter how dissimilar.
Talking to my child-free friend on the phone brought relief. She listened and she heard. She helped me see that, yes, we are really going through turmoil right now. It was validating, and it helped me feel like the load had been lightened. We chatted about her life, our shared histories, our thoughts about what the next few months might bring.
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