Climbing Kilimanjaro with Dad made me see how alike we really are

At the top of the world, the air is thin and it’s hard to breathe. I’m panting. It doesn’t help, but I can’t stop. Each breath in is short on oxygen. My lungs feel empty; they stay empty. Hunched over, the only thing to see is gravel and rock; the only other things to see are hard-crusted snow and darkness.“Hey,” The porter, the only other person up here, gets my attention.I’m stunned. It’s been days since I could smoke – not from lack of want, but from lack of air.

Tanzania is the furthest from home I’ve ever been. I look down from the top of that dark cold mountain top. As the night starts to lift – faint, early morning light, just a shade away from darkness creeping in – I see him. I see his tired, exhausted rhythm: Step. Stop. Pant. Later, when I’m sitting at home – the mountaintop over a decade in the past – and listening to a record, the vinyl spinsby Crosby, Stills & Nash. My father gave me this record. He built the wood-paneled speakers.

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