ASK AMY: This loving couple must learn to talk

My husband is fantastic; however, he takes zero interest in what is going on in my life. He never asks me how my day is, or wants additional details about anything, even if he knows that something important is going on.I will ask him about his day, and he always says, “the usual.”Most of us learn our communication styles from our family of origin. Your husband may have learned very early on that staying quiet was the best course for him.

In addition to not telling his own story, your husband is not being responsive, but this doesn’t necessarily mean that he doesn’t care about what’s going on with you. Well-known relationship researcher John Gottman has done important work in decoding how people make “bids” for connection. Listing his mother as his emergency contact might have been your husband’s first instinct, but I’d say it might be a poor choice.

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