Grandparents can play a special role in their grandkids’ lives, because they have a freedom that parents don’t.
“Mima, how do you say f*ck in Yiddish?” my 13-year-old cheekily asks my mom over bowls of tomato soup.
My mom immediately picks up the mantle of this question with great seriousness and begins to think out loud about which word for f*ck might fit the bill. One might wonder why such deliberation was necessary. Still, Yiddish is a language that has many words for one thing, each with its own nuance — the situation, the intonation, the
My son and mother batted back and forth a variety of options — him offering up one he’d heard from an aunt, her explaining why that word for f*ck wasn’t quite right — they then veered down the path of exploring the many,words for penis in Yiddish. Lunch ended with the two of them giggling and my mom promising to check herSome of you may be reading this aghast. How inappropriate! The profanity! Sure. Fine.
A love of words and language is woven into my family’s DNA. I have incredibly fond memories of playing Scrabble with my mom and my own Nana. They are those maddening Scrabble players who know words like QUA and put them on the triple word score square — at that point; the game is as good as over. As I got older, I was better able to enjoy the experience of playing with them, looking out to protect the triple word score before the matriarchal vultures swept in.
But there was so much good that came of them, too. Inside jokes that set my mom and my kids into giggles, butterfly kisses on their cheeks and raspberry zerberts on their bellies when they were little, text exchanges after a big game, and worry for the outcome of an exam when they grew older. And yes, sometimes grandparents say things they shouldn’t, offering insights when they’re not welcome or opining on topics that feel private to kids.
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