Many people are incorporating psych terms into their relationships and even arguments. Is this helpful? Or can it be a kind of weaponization of language?
naming and taming
some triggering issues. Having knowledge of psychological language in this way can be an extension or form of knowing oneself. For instance, knowing what your ‘love language’ is can help make sense of why your partner’s advances just don’t seem to go anywhere with you. Knowing that small gifts or gestures really make you feel secure while touching pushes you away is very good knowledge that you and your romantic partner need. This can work even better when it is translated into “I language” that explicitly communicates your want.
Psychoeducation can also be useful in specifying or articulating a confused communication pattern in a couple. What looks like stonewalling or rejection to one partner can, in fact, be a gesture of, indicating a high level of self-attunement in an apparently withdrawing partner. Being able to name this distinction with the use of psychological language can help us get out of deadlocks and cycles that escalate and seem unending.
A little psychoeducation gleaned from online sources can quickly turn into a means by which to diagnose your spouse, usually as a way to circumvent your own responsibility in a conflict situation. While there may indeed be some evidence in your informal diagnosis, most of us are not clinicians and diagnosticians, and diagnoses take time, precision, and expertise.
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