“There's meaning to relationships that don't last. Just because something ends doesn’t mean it wasn't real love.”
“It’s a reality check. The reality is, some people don’t stay. And not only is that okay but in this really gorgeous way, it is the necessary cycle of life. We go through phases, seasons, and hopefully we all go through an evolution. Within that cycle of life and time, we willwho we thought would forever be in our orbit. It’s reality.” These are the wise words of 23-year-old New Yorker Justin Frett. He’s grasped a concept that many of us find deeply uncomfortable: Some loves aren’t for life.
There’s something freeing in this outlook, too. We don’t have to live and operate in a space of permanence. Psychotherapist and authorbelieves that dating with the goal of finding the love of our life can create pressure and perfectionist tendencies when judging both ourselves and the people we are dating. It also takes us away from being in the present. “What we need in a relationship today will be different to what we need tomorrow.
As a society, we have long held “forever love” at the top of the relationship hierarchy. We celebrate the milestones — 60 years of marriage is called a “diamond anniversary” — but we neglect the formative, valid and loving relationships that might not stretch so far. Not every breakup is shrouded in bad blood. Southwell stresses that even in her seasonal relationships, she’s been very happy, has loved and been loved. “There's meaning to relationships that don't last.
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