A Ms. conversation with legal scholar Diane Rosenfeld and activist Ashley Judd reveals what some of our closest relatives can teach us about preventing sexual violence.
Well, he never tries. So this is what happens: A female is sitting on a branch. She’s observing her world. She’s lost in introspection. She’s scratching herself. A limb is dangling akimbo, and a male decides he may want to solicit her. She watches him approach. She considers her answer. If she decides she is interested in copulating with him, she does, and if she decides she isn’t, she signals to him that her answer is no. And he ambles away. No cost. No retaliation.
If she decides she is interested in copulating with him, she does, and if she decides she isn’t, she signals to him that her answer is no. And he ambles away. No cost. No retaliation. Females have choice in their copulations and total autonomy.: In your book, you argue that men have counted on their ability to pit women against one another to prevent them from rising up against the illegitimacy of patriarchy.
I have a niece who, when she was 14, started to work at Chick-fil-A. I thought, oh my goodness, the sexual harassment that is going to be heaped upon her. You know, “Can I have a milkshake and something else …?” I taught her to say right away, “Thank you for your order, and your comment is inappropriate and unwelcome.”
What happens if we start from the premise that all women are created equal? One way is to think about equality among and between women instead of viewing sex equality as a question of how women are equal to men’s status. Every woman can take an inventory of her own privileges and resources and then start to share them with other women. We have enough food in this country to feed everyone two times over every single day. We can protect one another’s children.
I’m in the process of creating the Bonobo Sisterhood Alliance to lift up each other’s work, provide resources and have a place to go to share stories and ideas. I’m also creating a Pro Bonobo Legal Action Network with my students through the years who are now working at law firms.
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