If you know the steps, accepting compliments is as easy as 1, 2, 3.
Get a larger “sample size” if you have a hard time believing a compliment.The only words you need to say after someone gives you a compliment are “thank you.” But you know that’s easier said than done. When you don’t believe the compliments that people pay, you limit how well you know yourself., too many compliments in your childhood, etc. The causes are complicated but the path to accepting compliments is simpler. It’s a three step process. First, believe what people tell you.
You have to listen carefully to compliments. It’s not always obvious if you’re being complimented for something only you can know or something others can observe. You will know better than I ever will if you have a stomach ache. Unless it's really bad, that’s invisible to the world. But we both have a say on whether or not you’re tall, short, smart, funny, happy, angry, or anything that is more observable.
If you are forty years old, five foot six inches tall, and weigh seventy pounds, I would say you are underweight. But if you are comparing yourself to someone who is an inch shorter than you and weighs five pounds less than you, you might call yourself large. In this extreme example, the outside perspective is more accurate than the internal one. When someone pays you a compliment they are speaking about something that is observable.
You have the steps. Now it’s up to you to implement them. Dial down your skepticism and assume that the person complimenting you is being authentic. If the comment is hard to take in, double check with a trusted person or persons until you’re satisfied. If satisfaction doesn’t come, then you will need to be more genuine yourself before you can integrate other people’s opinions.
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