Advice from Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin.
My fiance and I moved to a new neighborhood, and our neighbors have been really friendly, dropping by to introduce themselves.
After he was gone, I started wondering: Are we supposed to always invite our neighbors inside when they come over? We’re still unpacking, our house is far from tidy and sometimes when they stop by, it’s at an inconvenient time. At the same time, I don’t want to be considered rude.
One member of this couple seems to be going through some cognitive issues. He tells everyone assembled the same lengthy jokes and goes on and on about his religious and political views, always offending some present.We have run out of excuses to skip these parties, and sometimes just attend for an hour or two, mostly out of compassion for his husband. He presents a lovely buffet and must be struggling with his husband’s challenges. We bring a gift on the few times we attend.
: Someone evidently told you it would be a virtue to be honest with your hosts about why you dread their parties, but it was not Miss Manners. She is relieved that you have not done so.
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