Advice from Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin.
My friends, all gainfully employed adults, will often invite a group out to dinner or drinks to celebrate an occasion, like a birthday or professional milestone.
Twice in recent months, when the check came, one of the guests has proclaimed that the group would treat the host. There is not much to be done in the moment without looking cheap or ungenerous, but I feel annoyed that one person has unilaterally made a decision for which I have to pay.: Your friends may be gainfully employed, but they are not what Miss Manners would call adults. Anyone who thinks they can get away with such behavior and still have friends has much maturing to do.
Banks do it, call centers do it, salespeople do it. I always appreciate being called “Mr. Smith” instead of just “Bob,” but it rarely happens.
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