Maternal worry gets at the heart of what is terrifying about being alive.
I say this as though it’s easy. But learning how to respect my maternal worry without letting it control me—or, by extension, my child—has turned out to be one of my toughest parenting challenges.My son’s harrowing birth certainly didn’t help. He was born by emergency C-section with the cord wrapped tightly around his neck and a hidden plug of mucous in his airway that the medical team found only after 10 minutes of fruitlessly administering CPR.
My entry into motherhood was extreme, but I’ve heard from many mothers, especially in my clinical work as a psychologist, that their worry, too, feels subject to a lose-lose version of the Goldilocks effect: They are worrying either too little or too much, but never the right amount.For the past year, I’ve been conducting research into maternal anxiety, asking mothers to describe the experience in their own terms. A common theme is worryingtheir worrying.
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