In today's Dear Annie column, Annie Lane hears from a reader who is frustrated she's always the 'bad cop' and her husband doesn't back her up.
Annie advises today's reader to pick a time when their daughter isn't around and sit down and have a serious talk with her husband about being on the same page in punishing their daughter.
My husband and I have a 6-year-old daughter, “Eliza,” and we recently have not been seeing eye to eye in terms of how to handle discipline. For example, last week, when she refused to put her toys away after playing with them, I told her she couldn’t watch TV until it was done. She threw a fit, and instead of backing me up, my husband told her it was OK and helped her put the toys away himself.
These situations leave me feeling undermined and like I’m the only one enforcing rules. I don’t want her to feel she can pit us against each other, and I have also noticed myself getting more and more resentful when he takes her side over mine. I just think we need to be consistent, but I don’t know if it’s possible when our views on discipline seem fundamentally different.
Parenting is a team sport, and when kids see their parents supporting each other, they feel more secure -- and more likely to cooperate.
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