I have a good life and am feeling very guilty. What should I do?
DEAR ABBY: My sister and I were born seven years apart and didn’t have a relationship. This continued into our adult life and actually became worse. She was almost bordering on cruel. Our parents didn’t know. She married an abusive man who isolated her once our parents died. When my father passed away, they went in and took his belongings. Things like this were the norm for them. We barely spoke for 30 years unless I initiated a short, uncomfortable conversation.
Three years ago, my sister’s husband died suddenly, leaving her in a house that is infested with vermin and could be condemned. She and I now talk regularly, and I help her with some expenses. More costly things like major plumbing and roofing now need to be done. My sister wants to borrow money and pay it back in the future. I am not comfortable with that, and I’m struggling based on our past. -- OBLIGATED IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR OBLIGATED: What you should do is listen to your gut -- it is guiding you in the right direction. That your sister went in and stole your father’s property with no regard to what you should have received tells you all you need to know about her morals. Do not feel guilty for the good life you have created for yourself. You deserve it. Give your sister no more than you can afford to lose and you won’t be disappointed.
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