Dear Abby advises a wife of a disabled husband, a grandmother raising her grandson, and a woman whose friend keeps making fun of her weight.
My husband has cerebral palsy. He can talk, but his speech is slightly slurred. He can walk, but he’s unsteady on his feet. We love to go out and have a few drinks, but the issue is that people think he is intoxicated. We have been thrown out of places. We were almost thrown out of a ride-share service until I told the driver he has a disability. We were at a concert going up the steps , and everyone stared at him thinking he was drunk.
I am Joey’s everything. My life revolves around him. But, Abby, at 52, I feel I have earned the right to do as I want at this time in my life. I feel I would be punishing Joey if I gave him back to his mom to raise. His biological father is not in his life, although the paternal grandparents are in contact with him. Your thoughts on this situation? —Gladly. When Joey is 18, you will be 60. That is not over the hill. Please do not give up on your grandson at this point.
Instead of apologizing, she spent 15 minutes justifying what she said. But there was no real justification. Since then, I have avoided her. She keeps reaching out and asking to spend time with me, but at this point, I don’t feel I should. What would you do? —I would tell her no, and I would tell her in no uncertain terms exactly why.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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