CAMBRIDGE, MA—Having obtained a vital piece of intelligence that could prove critical to the United States in its war on terror, astronomers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology announced Wednesday the discovery of a distant exoplanet that is capable of harboring terrorists.
“After carefully analyzing the latest data from space telescopes, we can confirm that planet 12 Pegasi b has all of the conditions necessary to sustain an al-Qaeda sleeper cell,” said MIT professor Terrance Fuller, explaining that the presence of liquid water and an oxygen-rich atmosphere indicates the far-off planet would be hospitable to violent extremist ideologies that pose a threat to American values.
“While more research is needed to determine whether militant Islamists are indeed gathering strength and plotting attacks from a strategic base 1,400 light years from U.S. soil, we must assume an assault from this exoplanet is possible at any time.” At press time, Pentagon sources said the aerospace and defense contractor Lockheed Martin had been hired to obliterate 12 Pegasi b and thereby eliminate any jihadi fighters who might have found safe haven on the planet’s surface.
United States Latest News, United States Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Astronomers discover new almost dark galaxyBy analyzing deep optical imagery from the IAC Stripe 82 Legacy Project, an international team of astronomers has serendipitously discovered a new almost dark galaxy. The newfound galaxy, dubbed 'Nube,' has a very low surface brightness and is as massive as the Small Magellanic Cloud (SMC).
Read more »
In 1952, a group of three 'stars' vanished—astronomers still can't find themOn July 19, 1952, Palomar Observatory was undertaking a photographic survey of the night sky. Part of the project was to take multiple images of the same region of sky, to help identify things such as asteroids. At around 8:52 that evening a photographic plate captured the light of three stars clustered together.
Read more »
Rising interest rates, and prices keep homeownership as a distant goal, especially for African AmericansThe New Black View
Read more »
Astronomers carry out largest ever cosmological computer simulationAn international team of astronomers has carried out what is believed to be the largest ever cosmological computer simulation, tracking not only dark but also ordinary matter (such as planets, stars and galaxies), giving us a glimpse into how our universe may have evolved.
Read more »
Astronomers Capture First Radio Images of a “Ring of Fire” Solar EclipseScience, Space and Technology News 2023
Read more »
Astronomers show magnetic field of a red dwarf star may be approaching polar reversalThe 11-year solar activity cycle is a well-known phenomenon, during which the intensity of the sun's magnetic field varies and its polarities reverse. Over the past 30 years, astronomers have identified similar behavior in several sun-like stars.
Read more »