Moms : Just because you *can* work full-time, and cook, and watch your child, and clean, and do everything else, doesn't mean you should.
A very predictable dynamic is playing out between moms and dads working from home: Mom's doing the home while dad gets to work.
So many of us are. All together. The whole family.We're also at work now, at home. All together.The whole family. We would never bring our families to work, but now we've brought our work home to our families. And on top of that, the doors have been locked from the outside.
For those of us lucky enough to still have jobs, and to do them from the relative safety of our homes, the effects of Coronavirus-related school and office closures are destined to be far worse for women. If you're one of those women who's teaching your kids, changing the diapers, making the lunches, washing the dishes, and — oh yeah — working your day job, I encourage you to fight your fate.
Right now my husband and I are muddling through these early weeks as full time lawyers and caregivers to our two-year-old son. And trust me — it's not an Instagram-ready picture. Dried yogurt coats every surface of our house. I found juice running down our wall like a crime scene. A family of ants took up residence in our kitchen and a tick took up residence on our son's scalp. Our toilet overflowed —
twice!— and no one knows why except the guilty two-year-old who ran out of the bathroom yelling, "Don't spill the toilet!" Don't even get me started on my hair.RELATED: Women Have Worked Every Day This Year for FreeAs is often the case for hetero couples at the intersection of kids and career, at first I carried the weight of our load. In between virtual meetings and time-sensitive projects, I pulled out the tick and pulled out the Lysol. In between legal briefs I taught our son to play T-ball and did sprints down our driveway while doing a two-year-old's version of the conga. "Fast Conga," we call it. "Fast Conga" is also a metaphor for my life.
But while I Fast-Congaed all over the place, my husband sat comfortably in a warm bedroom upstairs. He talked on conference calls for 12-hour stretches, entirely unconcerned with what was happening on the other side of his door. When he emerged on Day 3 just minutes before our son's bedtime he said, "This is so hard!" I whipped my head around so fast I think I hurt myself. "Which part?!" I hissed, through my unbrushed teeth. As I glared at him with wide, terrifying eyes, I wanted to light him on fire. My son and I had barely seen him all week.
When I got pregnant three years ago, I ramped up my work and never slowed down. Before the baby came I worked until all hours of the night, effectively pre-working my maternity leave before I actually took it. When a big corporate re-org was announced when my son was an infant, I again worked until 3:00 AM most nights — only now I had a baby who often woke up at precisely 3:05. I worked so long and so hard I felt truly, frighteningly unwell. But that was a much smaller problem than the risk of getting
Even women lucky enough not to face blatant discrimination when pregnant or a new mother often fear subtle unconcious biases —she's probably too busy for this big case; she probably can't come to this dinner Read more: InStyle »
This is an excellent article and succinctly articulates what I feel about many couples working through lockdown. I’m fortunate enough to have a husband who respects my career regardless of title or income American women you can be free now and do anything you want to do. Do not seek advice from fashion magazines. Everybody likes fashion even me and I'm in Target pajamas all day today. Make up your mind what to do just pick something and live and learn.
That’s why I picked one, I was sick and tired of doing it all. I stay at home while my husband does what he always did I was tired of doing this all week and every weekend, something had to give so this works for our family. I’m not trying be super women anymore, it’s not fun! Good by! You’re all in it together, plan a routine that fits for your own home. This is a whole new situation for everyone to deal with.
My husband rocks! He cooks, he cleans the house and take care of the kids, I wash the dishes, do the laundry and take care of the kids. It’s 50/50 right here 💪🏻❤️. My husband cleans one day a week. He's proud of that. tbh house work was REALLYYY hard, can't stand doin it all the time evry single day, its fucking tiring...
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