Why More Americans Are Putting Off Having Kids

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A recent study found that the average age for new American parents is up to 26 for mothers and 31 for fathers, both record highs. The Onion looks at the top reasons why more Americans are putting off having kids.

A recent study found that the average age for new American parents is up to 26 for mothers and 31 for fathers, both record highs.Career ostensibly going to start taking off any day now.

Men finally getting hang of pulling out.Adults being more realistic about whether their genes worth passing on.Cuts in sex ed resulting in more couples being completely unaware of how to conceive.Want to figure out what happened to the last few first.

 

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Look what happened after Fred Trump spawned demon offspring. Who wants to be remembered for unleashing generations of Kkkrakkkens upon an unsuspecting world?

Because they’re awful

Financial Insecurity?

Because no one will buy them anymore. 🙁

Poor wages, poor health, poor prospects for the future.

Based on the picture, they are rowing in circles until they die of starvation.

It takes kids a good 7, 8 years to get any good at FPSs.

Teen mom shows finally paying off.

Headline team's off on Sundays

Kids suck. Even my niece isn’t thrilled with her spawn.

Oh my god y’all still exist. This puts a smile on my face

If they're trying to have sex in that boat, then yeah, not many kids from that. Super uncomfortable and unhygienic.

Hahahahaha

cuz fuck a shitty ass baby i gotta take care of TF

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