Tumor-Covered Chester Cheetah Apologizes For Role In Marketing Dangerously Cheesy Cheetos To Children
WASHINGTON—Speaking out against his former employer while testifying before Congress, terminally ill snack-food mascot Chester Cheetah apologized through tumor-riddled lips Friday for his role in marketing dangerously cheesy Cheetos to children. “I’m ashamed to have been a part of this campaign,” said Cheetah, who described his struggles from daily exposure to the dangerously cheesy snack, which destroyed his health, caused his fur to slough off in clouds of bright orange dust, and potentially played a role in his wife’s miscarriage. “For far too long, I’ve been complicit in covering up just how much damage these snacks have caused—especially for young children. I’m sure they all watched me skateboarding in my stylish sunglasses and envied the Flamin’ Hot lifestyle I lived on my TV show and in Sega Genesis games, but in reality, I was suffering, barely clinging onto life. I can’t take back the harm my actions have caused to the world’s children, but I promise them this: The harder Frito-Lay tries to sweep my condition under the rug, the harder I will fight. I refuse to be silenced.” Cheetah’s statement is the most severe mascot-related scandal to hit Frito-Lay since 1972, when the Frito Bandito was gunned down by treasury agents outside an El Paso currency exchange.Advertisement Read more: The Onion
Lol Corona virus flavored Cheetos are nothing to sneeze at Dangerously cheesy! He always seemed like a bullshit artist. So know he looks like a cheeto He did say they're dangerously cheesy... . Good thing I dont like Cheetos Better apology than the Asstros Oh my god Look at my profile pic.
Masked Singer presenter Davina McCall on the home births of her three childrenThe Masked Singer judge Davina McCall tells of her three home births with her children Holly, Tilly and Chester, who she shares with TV presenter Matthew Robertson
dont toot cheetos dust The Cheeteh Confessed To Using Cheap, Genetically Altered Corn, Bought From Trump Farms Conglomerate, To Make The Crunchy Snack. Did you know kids lick their fingers after eating Cheetos and then get their germy Cheeto fingers all over things. Here. Have some Cheetos. Too cheesy for them to handle
How the Shockingly Sophisticated Hot Cheetos Croissants at Koffeteria Are MadeHow the shockingly sophisticated Hot Cheetos croissants at Koffeteria are made (Via EaterHouston)
Disney's 'Queen of Katwe' star Nikita Pearl Waligwa has died at age 15Nikita Pearl Waligwa, a child star in Disney's 'Queen of Katwe,' was first diagnosed with a brain tumor in 2016. 😭😭😭 RIP Unfortunate. 🙁 So awful. So young and such a huge battle she fought. Rest in peace. Prayers to her family. 🙏🏼
Disney's 'Queen of Katwe' actor Nikita Pearl Waligwa dies at 15Nikita Pearl Waligwa, an actor who appeared in Disney's 'Queen of Katwe,' has died at age 15, according to BBC and the Ugandan newspaper Daily Monitor. My she rip. I loved that movie and she was so good in it. Sad too sad. Much too young
London Fashion Week’s Most Talked-About Hair Accessory Is In Your Bodega Aisle“I love the idea of a bunch of kids stuck in a shopping mall,” Fashion East designer Gareth Wrighton tells Vogue backstage of his Fall 2020 show. 🔥🥵☄️🤯 Thanks, Vogue, but I still prefer this. 📸 interfIix via danjlevy 👑 Mocking Jesus in Fashion fabulous
“Queen of Katwe” Actor Nikita Pearl Waligwa Has Died at 15Our thoughts are with her family and friends at this time. 💔 This is so sad. She was a great talent and inspiration.