Q: I've been having trouble connecting to myself sexually because of past sexual trauma. Porn, in particular, is a trigger for me. I have a therapist but don’t want to talk about it. Do I have to?
ADVERTISEMENT However, if your therapist is competent and trustworthy, staying silent about core issues just doesn’t serve you. At worst, it wastes your time and reinforces for you the notion that what happened to you and your reactions are literally unspeakable. That message is traumatizing and stands in the way of your healing process. Since you say you’re having issues “connecting to yourself sexually,” at least part of you clearly wants to move in the direction of healing.
ADVERTISEMENT Opening up about trauma generally isn’t easy, especially at first, but it is worthwhile. Talking about it with a trained therapist can change its controlling, triggering role in your life and help prevent, or reverse, the process of taking on shame because of your experiences.
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