There’s an Unspoken Truth About Marriage. I’m Living It Almost Every Day.

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How do you love someone, not to mention make love to someone, whom you persistently envy?

There’s an Unspoken Truth About Marriage. I’m Living It Almost Every Day.I think it’s something more dynamic, though. I love Jack, and Jack loves me. But love at this advanced marital age feels less like romance than like learning. For 40 years, it’s been every day’s problem to figure out how to inch ourselves toward balance. More days than not, now, we solve it. I drive to the restaurant, then hand him the car keys.

The new day dawns with its peanut-butter dew.The illustrated Sprats I read about as a child look old enough to be married as long as we have. What I see, now, though, are not their bodies but their faces—two very different expressions of fulfillment. And when I sing myself their verse, I notice it never claims they lived “happily ever after” or even that they’re happy at all. They are in harmony, I think, which may be an antiquated emotion, a geezer’s version of passion.

 

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