Photo: Catherine Falls Commercial/Getty Images Like most people seeking guidance on how to navigate literally anything in the time of COVID-19, I’ve been routinely checking in with a medical professional online. Well, on Instagram. Not Dr. Fauci. Dr. Becky, a.k.a. Rebecca Kennedy, a New York City–based licensed clinical psychologist with a Ph.D. from Columbia University, three young kids, and about 800,000 similarly rapt followers on Instagram.
Welcome to “sturdy leadership” and “co-regulation” — both of which validate a child’s feelings, allow you to check in with your own emotions, and keep boundaries clear so a child knows their freaking out isn’t going to infect the person at the controls. Over the course of the pandemic, Kennedy has become what some have called the “Millennial Parenting Whisperer,” releasing a podcast called Good Inside, , a newsletter of the same name, and downloadable parenting seminars. A Dr. Becky book is in the works, too.
But for time-starved, attention-short parents — two-thirds of whom say parenting today is harder than it was 20 years ago, according to Pew research — one of the most useful things is Dr. Becky is not a parenting book. “Or a weekend seminar or anything else that takes a ton of time at once,” says Catherine Hopkinson, a copywriter in Brooklyn and mother of one.
King points out that Kennedy’s advice may not work for all kids: “It’s not that simple for neurodivergent kids,” she explains. “They don’t just calm down when they hear and feel us calm down because they may have additional differences in attention, communication, anxiety, and social skills that interfere with their ability to connect with a caregiver in that moment.
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